Welcome radical readers!
Today is a perfect day to notice and love yourself.
I read an article speaking to the importance of Self Acceptance. In it, Psychotherapist Dr. Danielle Ottosen shares actionable tips towards self-love. She also mentions 83% of women and 75% of men admit to disliking their bodies. These numbers are a shocking and heart-breaking example of how we reject ourselves. Let’s shift these numbers by choosing Radical Self Acceptance.
Before we can choose Radical Self Acceptance, it may be advantageous to define it. Defining terms can be helpful when we are reaching for something new. Big concepts like Love, Acceptance, and Worth can understandably seem overwhelming or unattainable when we haven’t put our finger on their meaning.
With that being said, it’s imperative to remember definitions (like us) are flexible and changeable.
Don’t forget, nothing is set in stone, and you know best.
According to BetterHelp, Radical Acceptance means accepting everything about yourself, your current situation, and your life without question, blame, or pushback.
I’ve added the Self in Radical Acceptance because I know everything truly starts and ends with Self. When you practice Radical Self Acceptance, you’ll notice how much easier accepting any life circumstance becomes.
Some may read ‘life circumstance’ as a challenging coworker, a chronic illness, or a mysterious ding on your car – they all count. Can you imagine moving from a place where life’s painful circumstances aren’t causing you suffering? It’s possible and it starts with Radical Self Acceptance.
In her docuseries Dancing with the Devil, Demi Lovato says,
“Anytime you suppress a part of yourself it’s gonna overflow.”
This means when we restrict our thoughts or issues we inadvertently store them until they overflow. The best way to move them out is actually to be with them – to notice and allow them.
We can learn much about an authentic relationship with self and Radical Self Acceptance through Lovato’s vulnerability.
The following exercise is one way to make sure we aren’t pushing away or suppressing any parts of ourselves.
Start Practicing Radical Self Acceptance
Begin by simply noticing your thoughts.
When a thought comes in, listen to it, and repeat it back to yourself.
It may sound something like this:
Thought: I’m not good at this
Thought Response: Okay, I’m thinking I’m not good at this
Thought: I hate my body
Thought Response: Okay, I am feeling hate for my body right now
It’s really that simple. Listen, say okay, and reflect it back to yourself.
Ultimately, Radical Self Acceptance can be defined as not pushing any part of yourself away. That means allowing whatever you find space to be.
Once we give ourselves space to be, we can start asking curious questions and are more likely to hear answers to those questions.
If you’d like to learn more ways to love and accept yourself check out Daily Dose of Self Love. Find a trailer for Demi Lovato’s docuseries Dancing with the Devil premiering March 23rd, 2021 here.
Stay curious,
Caroline
Caroline Exner is a Healing Conversationalist and Ceremony Facilitator supporting her clients on their journey inward. Find out more about her work or schedule a session with her here.
Feature Image by Meital Anlen. Beautiful plus-size woman in a Body-Positive photoshoot.
In-text image by Content Pixie. A swing in front of a spa in Bali.
Amazing post. Self acceptance is so important. And definitely doesn’t come easily to a lot of people but starting small and starting somewhere is key!
Hi Jenny! Thank you for taking the time to respond to my writing. It is nice to connect with you. I love the work you are doing in this area too! I agree — start small and start somewhere.